Friday, June 15, 2012

Stars and Sparkles

"There's nothing better in life than to just be the little star you were meant to be and sparkle in the spot in space where God put you. It may not seem like much at the time, but your whole-hearted shine will give the world a brighter night."

It was one of those days. 

Did you ever read Pilgrim's Progress?  Well, sometimes I can sympathize with Christian locked away in Doubting Castle by Giant Despair. 

I was laying in my bed last night and started the whole self-pity thing.  Now if you have ever had any experience with a selfish self-pity, you know that it usually gets worse and worse.  My mind started out with how my life is so boring...i try to plan fun things to do, but no one wants to do them...if there are parties, I'm left one ever cares about me....everyone thinks I'm weird....and well, I think you got the point. 

But of course, I didn't stop there.  You can't stop with just that when you're on a steady roll of depressing thoughts. 

I then started to think that no one really likes me, and I thought about how there are at least one-hundred and one reasons why people shouldn't like me.  My nose is too big, my quirks are too strange, my personality is too loud and obnoxious (okay, I won't list all one-hundred and one reasons for time's sake- you get the idea). 

The next step of my pity party was to start thinking about how my life is so meaningless.  
By now I was sure I would be spreading the love of God in some foreign, disease-stricken land, or rescuing sex slaves from the brothels of a mystique Asian country, or caring for orphans that have been neglected or unloved.  I mean if I would die tomorrow because of a spinning tornado or crashing plane, I would have not even made a difference in this life.  Really, all I do is work for the family business and go to church every Sunday---that sounds like a real booming life, right?! 

Sounding like Eeyore yet? 

Well, that's about how I was feeling. 

And then I started thinking about stars.  Yup, that's strange to start thinking about stars when you are self-pitying yourself; but what can I say, my mind is afflicted with A.D.H.D.  I started thinking about all the thousands and millions and trillions of stars in the night sky.  What if one of those tiny, far-away stars started to think that she was of no importance, that she doesn't make a difference, that she doesn't matter?  Her misery would slowly cloud over her until not even the faintest of light would sparkle anymore. 

But instead, those stars are just happy with the little space where God put them.  They may not feel like they are doing anything grand, especially when they look around them at the big ole' planets spinning and dancing.  

However, they realize that as long as they let their light sparkle as brightly as they possibly can, they are making a difference.  They add a bit of light to the darkest of nights. 

Then God told me----

That even though I may not feel like I'm worth anything or making a difference, as long as I'm following Him and giving my sparkliest best wherever I am, I am worth the whole world to Him.  No, I may not be on the mission field like a Mary Slessor, but I can reach out to the ones around me.  No, I may not be rescuing young girls like an Amy Carmichael, but I can pray for them.  No, I may not be helping orphans like a Gladys Alward, but I can share the money I make with the ones who are helping them.  Besides, what good does it do to sit around in self-pity?  That is pure selfishness when I focus on myself and my problems- instead of what I could be doing for God and others. 

So with that, God gave me the key to exit my little dungeon of despair. 

All through the thought of a little star somewhere way up in the night sky that just kept on sparkling!